sue murray

MACHINE MAN
My ideas have evolved while making my image. I started by thinking about how SCI uses technology to improve peoples’ quality of life and this developed into the idea of the machine combined with the man. With spinal cord injury we rely heavily on technology. We will all live longer using technology.

I think of myself as someone capable, someone strong. People look at me. I say yeah mate, I’m here. This is who I am. This is me. I deserve to be here. I’m no different to you.

In my image I have that look. I’m ready to fight through life. Someone who is proud of who he is. Not afraid of peoples perceptions. My personal experience. I have had looks. but I’m not afraid of how I am. Don’t worry about me.

FELINITY

I chose to merge the face of a tiger with my face because tigers or feline animals often are associated with characteristics such as courage and bravery, whilst still remaining elegant.

After my accident I have found that I need to face certain challenges that are a side effect of quadriplegia and I prefer to take on a feline attitude to do so.

RISING

This image represents the deflated feeling I felt when I initially got the spinal cord injury - but I have been slowly lifted up by the love of family and friends, and projects like this.

Life goes on with endless opportunities. Weirdly enough, a lot of freedom has come with this life. No longer just grinding the Nine to Five.

REGIME

One effect of my SCI is bowel dysfunction. I manage this with a “bowel regime” that requires time to be set aside.

For 40 years three times a week I have been, and will always be, “busy”. This leaves gaps in time that I am unavailable for the things I could be doing... work, social life, etc.

This is something that I keep private; colleagues, even some family and close friends don’t know, they just hear “sorry I can’t make it” — “good idea but can we make it another time”.

I have chosen this for my image because, more than using a wheelchair, the regime calendar governs my life and is integral to my internal identity.

THE GIRL WITH THE PEARL EARRING
I chose to appropriate Vermeer’s painting ‘The Girl With the Pearl Earring’. By appropriating Vermeer’s artwork I aimed to identify myself as an artist and jewellery designer.
Sitting in the studio in front of the camera was a challenge. I felt a sense of vulnerability and came to the realisation that the feeling of being viewed or judged is a bigger part of my identity as a quadriplegic than I had previously admitted.
Fighting against the reality of being powerless in many different circumstances is both an internal and external struggle that plays an important part in who I am. I fight against the notion that the wheelchair defines my identity as I don’t want to feel limited by my disability.
On another level I identified with Vermeer’s work as a quadriplegic because I am unable to regulate my body temperature, & it is common for me to wrap my head in scarves as I only feel & regulate temperature in my head & neck. Temperature control plays an important role in my life & the lives of many other quadriplegics. It is an invisible issue that alters the way we live and interact with others.
Being unable to regulate my own body temperature is sometimes dangerous but mostly it is just inconvenient as it interrupts my day to day life. When it is cold my muscles tighten & instead of feeling cold I feel pain which directly alters my ability to move & my overall mood. Lack of temperature control is also a social impairment as on cold days you will often find me with scarves wrapped around my head or even a blanket over my entire head making going out in public or having visitors uncomfortable.

I DON’T GIVE A HOOT
INSPIRED BY VAN GOGH STARRY NIGHT
I sing to myself ‘What a wonderful world’
In 1991 I was travelling around New Zealand. The woman who was driving put her foot on the accelerator instead of the brake and skidded off the road. I nearly died.
Before 1991 I was very shy. After 1991 I didn’t give a hoot.

DOMINO EFFECT
After acquiring a spinal cord injury many years ago resulting in quadriplegia, I have needed to advocate from both a personal and professional perspective, to address various issues that are negatively impacting on the quality of life of people with a spinal cord injury (and people with physical disability in general).
As bad attitudes towards people with disability can be the cause of many other barriers, I wanted my image to portray the domino effect of removing bad attitudes which can lead to removing discrimination, inequity and barriers etc.

NO TITLE

It took me ages to be able to look at myself in a wheelchair, coz it’s not how I think of who I am.

Finally I just thought to myself this is how I’m going to be for a while, so I may as well get over it.

REFLECTION
THE DESTINATION IS THE SAME, IT’S THE JOURNEY THAT’S DIFFERENT.
This is an image that shows where I have been & where I am going.
I really liked cycling before but now it’s my passion. It’s all about the bike. This is ironic because it is how I became a paraplegic.
I do some times call myself a “triplegic” because 3 out of my 4 limbs were affected. I am one of those statistics of when cars and cyclists collide. I was doing a training ride for my first iron man triathlon, when I was struck by a car on Southern Cross drive. I don’t remember my accident at all. I lost 3 whole days and woke up nearly 5 weeks later.
Because I don’t remember my accident I don’t associate fear with riding. Some people find this hard to believe that I am riding again after such a horrific accident. I love the feeling of freedom that comes with riding my bike. I have found a way to regain that freedom with my bike.
I don’t regret my accident. I am experiencing an amazing life since my “change of course” and met some remarkable people, something I don’t think I would have been privy to before.
My life is a slower pace now, so I literally stop and smell the roses. I do everything differently than how I did it before my accident. My body doesn’t function the same. I take the everyday difficulties that spinal cord injury throws at me as just another exciting challenge to conquer. There is no “I cant do that”, but “let me find a way to do it myself”
I want to go back to the Pyrenees, in France, to cycle the mountains again but it will be in my altered state, on my trike.
This picture is about: What I was. What I can do. The road is endless. My goals are the same; to ride the Pyranees. My journey is different, on 3 wheels not 2.
My advice to other people, especially, those with spinal cord injury is “to get back on your bike”